Nothing wrong with a bit of pleasure, but why do we equate it with happiness and where do these two things differ? Continue reading Happiness, pleasure, and the worlds in between
It’s fair to say that everyone struggles with disappointment. So how do we avoid self-destructive behaviour and not expect outcomes in the first place?
Continue reading Expectations are premeditated resentments
I wish this was a just a spooky Halloween story. Continue reading I woke up to a stranger in my home
The people here in the UK are known to have a stiff upper lip;
they hold back on showing their feelings as emotional public displays are discouraged. But why is that dangerous? Continue reading How to stop repressing your emotions!
For months now I had been watching my screen time steadily creeping up, from scrolling on social media to binge watching series on Netflix.
Enough was enough! Continue reading From 8 hours screen time to 0! What I learned from a full day without screens
With school and work, we get used to hanging out with who we mesh with best. But when we change, is it fair to expect others to change too? Continue reading How I’ve lost all of my friends in a year and couldn’t be happier
I did not expect to cry watching Paris Hilton’s new documentary “This Is Paris”.
It did not just touch nostalgia, but also trauma. Continue reading Why you have more in common with Paris than you thought
Can I see others for who they truly are, or for who I want them to be?
Too often we equate dependency with love. Continue reading Addicted to love: Dependency in relationships
Why is it that we can only see our flaws when spotting them in others?
Once the connection had been made however, I could not sit idly by. Continue reading Seeing red flags where there are none
I entered the 12-steps fellowships hoping to get rid of my cravings.
And I did! Continue reading This surprising lesson from 12-step fellowships
Today has been a rollercoaster, but I didn’t think I would be feeling like this tonight. Instead, I am feeling ashamed, guilty and fearful. Continue reading Shame, guilt and fear: my favourite cocktail
We talked about not relaxing with meditation, exercise being uncomfortable and finally getting tired of fidgety during yoga. Why is that and how can we help it? Continue reading Fidgety or yawning during yoga? Here’s why!
There’s a lot of lists with good virtues, tricks that get you far in life or psychological growth secrets. However, there is nothing as simple and life-changing as this. Continue reading These 2 letters are your greatest superpower
After delaying gratification, accepting responsibility and the importance of truth, we will read about the final ingredient to processing pain according to Peck: balance! Continue reading Balance: The final part to processing pain
No matter our self-growth, once our ego gets triggered it’s hard to see the bigger picture. Here’s a trick to quickly disengage! Continue reading My secret tip to DEACTIVATE your ego!
This is my third post in my series for M. Scott Peck’s The Road Less Travelled.I’ve been really enjoying writing about his 4 essential steps to process pain from problem-solving!First we learned about the importance of delaying gratification and accepting … Continue reading The words less spoken: why truth matters
Whatever is going on in my life is not an excuse for how I’m feeling, and especially not for how I’m acting.
But how to stop reacting and respond instead? Continue reading Reacting vs responding – how to keep your side of the street clean
While I work hard play hard, even my play won’t ever chill. Why do I prefer to go-go-go instead of letting go? Continue reading Why I go-go-go instead of let go!
Today I will speak to you about accepting responsibility. (yay, everyone’s favourite!) Can we solve a problem before accepting responsibility for it? Continue reading Start living by accepting responsibility!
Are we able to heal rifts as they happen and part amicably, or do we carry resentments with us? Continue reading Annoyed? 3 reasons why you should reach out
You do not procrastinate because you’re lazy, but because you prefer the easy.
How do we find beauty in our problems? Continue reading Delay gratification, avoid suffering
There’s many asking whether to cut off friendships, break up or limit communication. Why do we rely so much on external validation to follow our heart? Continue reading Is it okay to…? or Trust your intuition!
This is the mantra of shame researcher Brené Brown. What is the difference between getting it right and being right, and what does it have to do with shame? Continue reading Here to GET it right, not BE right
All humans start life as helpless children, and not all grow up to be independent adults. Stepping into adulthood requires embracing risk. Continue reading Have you grown into independence?
This is a saying in the addict community to describe our using. The poetic nature of it strikes me, and I can’t help relate the saying to all. Continue reading First Magic, then Medicine, finally Madness
At the start, both parties are looking for compatibility. But are you seeing the other person really for who they are, or who you want them to be? Continue reading 10 signs that you’re ignoring red flags!
Desires make our capitalist world go round, but can we widen the gap on acting on them? Do we act on our yearnings, or are we controlled by them? Continue reading FEELING instead of BEING the desire
Self-care has become synonymous for personal downtime and treating ourselves unhealthily. The true meaning of self-care has evaded us. Continue reading Self-care is often a very unbeautiful thing – Brianna Wiest
I used to think my creativity comes from suffering and drugs. Access to this magical land was given to me only when earned. Not anymore! Continue reading How to find your deep well of creativity and knowing
How come I managed to completely jump to conclusions THREE TIMES this week, each tragic and comical time resulting in me crying and waves of sadness? Continue reading Breaking my own heart by expecting the worst
Obviously we deserve to take it easy from time to time. It is possible to be unproductive and still make yourself proud! But are you sleeping easy tonight? Continue reading Have you made yourself proud today?
Identity is a funny thing. What do you describe yourself as? Did we become what we are describing, or do we become it as we speak? Continue reading I am no longer myself and I love it
There’s many ways we reach out for reassurance when we are doubting ourselves. But did you know that this coping mechanism actually worsens self-doubt? Continue reading The surprising link between reassurance and doubt
Last night I had a scary experience with my rat Brain. Thankfully everything was fine in the morning, but I couldn’t help feeling: Shouldn’t I be happier? Continue reading How you process relief says a lot about you
Now everyone is as paranoid as we were, and in a perverse way, it feels like a weight is taken off my shoulders. Now it is onto other people to be anxious! Continue reading Here’s why you don’t want lockdown to end
Once again, I feel myself slipping. It’s a mixture of procrastinating and disassociating, this getting lost in daydreams. Continue reading Sticky bodies and disassociating daydreams
I have learned that fear is something to seek out. Good stuff happens once we venture out of our comfort zone. Why do we abandon them then? Continue reading Having and then talking myself out of ideas
Identity politics are thriving right now. But the fear of the other and national pride identity are stronger than mere ethics. Continue reading Victim and victimiser: Why guilt doesn’t work in activism
Years ago, I attended a house party. Sat around, we started talking about racism. As the only BAME person in the room, I believed myself an authority. Continue reading How denial drives us to reject growth and help
I reached out to someone I hadn’t spoken to in over 3 years to apologise for the hurt that I had caused them in our relationship. Scary, right? Continue reading Apologising to my first love (and crying for hours)
“I give so much love to everyone” said someone on this Abraham Hicks talk, “yet receive so little back. How do I stop myself from being resentful?” Continue reading Giving love but receiving none: the struggle of the lonely
Since lockdown started, I have massively gotten into self-improvement podcasts. Here are a few of my favourites to get your journey started! Continue reading Grow on the go: my 7 favourite podcasts!
All this may seem far out of reach, and yet your hopes are about to come true:All you’ve ever dreamt for yourself is about to be you. Continue reading To my younger self: Once you know yourself
It’s easy to be aware of what you’re doing, but can you label what you feel? We can minimise misunderstandings, be self-aware and lead happier lives. Continue reading Emotional intelligence and Brackett’s mood meter
It’s often hard enough to get ourselves to apologise, but did you know there are rules to it? To truly mend relationships, here are some tips. Continue reading 9 essentials tips for a true apology
What we are looking for is where we are looking from.If we wait for the outside world to praise us, we will forever remain a follower. Continue reading No outside validation – gratitude for all things
I spend years hoping someone’s love could save me from the pit inside my soul. That they would find my flaws endearing, and in turn so would I. Continue reading Can others love us if we don’t love ourselves?
You would think I’d welcome having people looking forward to my work. But instead, I’m filled with dread and freeze up. Why am I so petrified of attention? Continue reading Bittersweet responsibilities of work
I am far from a self-hate book hater. There is however a pitfall we fall into when we content ourselves to reading them that I’d like to explore. Continue reading Why self-help books will only take you so far
We all have goals, and we all procrastinate. I like to blame perfectionism on holding me back. What is this mental barrier we put in front of ourselves? Continue reading ‘Perfectionism is like holding my breath.’
I’m the queen of self-depreciating humour. I like how it eases every mood and keeps me humble. Do my jokes keep me in check, or should I check them? Continue reading Why self-depreciating humour will bite you in the ass
It’s not always possible to cut negative people out of our lives, and neither do we always want to. Is there a way to manage our emotions more effectively? Continue reading 6 secrets to dealing with negative people
There’s always been a stigma around loneliness. Now more than ever, we should not be ashamed of it. Here are six ways to build our relationships. Continue reading Overcoming loneliness and strengthening relationships
You’re not alone in feeling lonely! A lack of friends might feel dooming, but here are a few ways to meet new people and even growing as a person! Continue reading Making new friends (for free!) without leaving your home
They say it takes 21 days to form a new habit, but how to make that first step? Here’s a few tips and tricks to get into the routine! Continue reading Got no structure? Here’s how to form new habits
How heavy the weight of our resentments is! From childhood, our romantic relationships and friendships: we all carry them with us. Continue reading On admitting my resentments: Step 5 of recovery
Do you feel stuck between loving and hating the people you’re self-isolating with? Anger and resentment are natural emotions, now more than ever. Continue reading Want to kill your family? How to deal with anger in lockdown
As empaths we often forget that the body and mind are interconnected. Simply treating the physical symptoms won’t do, we need to heal. Continue reading The curse of being a natural empath and caregiver
Stuck inside feeling useless and unmotivated? You’re not alone.
With everyone working from home, our usual routines have been messed up. Continue reading 3 motivational to-do’s when you don’t want to do anything
Along with our other senses, interoception can give us insight into why our body is feeling the way it is. Our body is speaking to us continuously, we have just forgotten its language! Continue reading Interoception: what you need to know about your eighth sense
Put me in a room full of strangers, and within minutes I have singled out the person I will crush on for the next few weeks. Continue reading Fast crushes and easy heartbreaks
Humans are not meant to be isolated for so long, and being physically alone can have serious consequences. Are you touch deprived? Continue reading Touch-deprived? How to cope with social distancing
Being grateful to our parents has nothing to do with the fact we crave their approval to an unhealthy degree. Are you scared of their rejection? Continue reading Why you NEED a break from your parents
‘It doesn’t matter what I say!’ I finally realised after years of living with a narcissist.
‘No matter what I do, I get attacked for it!’ Continue reading Grey rock method: How to rid yourself of narcissists
The nuance between admitting and accepting our flaws and past is a big point of contention in the recovery community. After I’ve combed through memory loss of my early childhood experiences and years lost through substance abuse, I was faced … Continue reading Admittance vs Acceptance – why the difference matters
I thrive in chaos. It has been a childhood companion to me, always waiting around the corner. Continue reading There’s nothing more frustrating than trying to relax
Elizabeth Gilbert, needless to say, wrote Eat, Pray, Love, and is all in all a beautiful source of inspiration for me. I found this tied in beautifully with the four noble truths of the Buddha. The first states that suffering … Continue reading Any talent not shared turns into pain – Elizabeth Gilbert (or the silver lining to our suffering)
I must be the first person ever to state this, and I’m well aware of the controversy. After all, 38 deaths have been linked to former reality star contestants, and the online trolling has been horrendous. How come someone as … Continue reading How reality TV is helping my mental health (no joke)