Why Buddhism attracts people-pleasers

To be fair, this is valid for all religions (cue Fleabag asking for someone to tell her what to do in life).
Not that Buddhism is a religion, it’s more a way of life and dedication to philosophy. Buddhism is divided into two major strands: Theravada, the oldest and most conservative, and Mahayana, most popular and open to new interpretations.
While Theravada and other strands such as Vajrayana seek individual enlightenment, Mahayana followers pursue altruism and compassion for all. More than that, they dedicate positive karma and any merit of their practices to the benefit of others, thus actively delaying their enlightenment.

So if you are someone who believes that keeping other people happy is what keeps you safe, Buddhism may actually feel like an enabling defense mechanism – instead of pushing toward awareness.

Buddhists also believe that our world is created internally – we see things based on past experiences, values or attachment to ourselves. So if we believe something already, such as that our own needs are not as important as other people’s needs, we will look for what seems to reinforce this.
But Buddhism does not advocate for anyone to be a doormat. To be truly helpful to others, we need to do what’s for the common good – and not what people want us to do. Can we be aware of our resources, of what enables other people’s negative patterns, and have the courage to do what is right and not what is easy?

Selfishness means thinking of yourself first – be it positively or negatively.
If you help others because you believe them more worthy of your time, because them being uncomfortable is unbearable compared to you being uncomfortable, then you are selfish.

So while I believed myself naturally predisposed to Buddhism, thinking I could ace all the ‘for the benefit of others’ stuff, I gradually learned that there is nothing altruistic about putting other people first because you are scared of them.
The way I see it, it’s not about my or your enlightenment anyway. I don’t do the right thing because I want to be saved, or because I want to save you.
I truly believe that mine and everyone else’s essence is the same and that all the extras around them (our thoughts, bodies, past) are inherently empty.
I either put us all first, or nobody at all.
I may have gotten into Buddhism because it gave me a pretext to stay the same, but it has allowed me to see that I am already the same as everyone else, I just need to act on it.